Liver and Anger

Name: Ryan Van Denburgh and D.V.
Issue: Liver (related to anger / revenge) (15 Hd)

6/18-19/09-Hd4-L2-3G(d,m)

Visual: Train on tracks runs out of coal out in the middle of nowhere and stops on the tracks. Another train comes along, derailing it and knocking it off the tracks as it goes, then keeps going. The engineer is pissed. Now both out of fuel and derailed. Particularly pissed at the other train. He wants revenge but won't get it because he has no way of finding who did it. He will simply be angry his whole life.
Intent: Protection (against the unkindness of others). Justification (in this case by shifting blame).

Relation to Liver: Liver is the center of metabolism. Life may offer some unpleasant realities which we refuse to accept (and would rather blame) or “metabolize”. These disempower us in that by not accepting responsibility for unpleasant outcomes, we are likely to see them repeat. We need to accept and process all that comes down the pipe. For after all, we swallowed it.

New Visual: A seal trying to balance a ball. After a time, it falls off and he catches it with his flipper, after many attempts with the same result, he tries balancing again and falls backward into a pool of water. He gets out and tries again.

Relation: Life is like a ball we try to balance. No one else is ultimately responsible besides us. We must accept full responsibility and full ownership for the outcome. We are certain to fail at times, but that is OK, it's a learning process, just go back at it again. We may even fall big time, but the worst thing that can happen is that our egos get drenched. Get back up! (BTW it's all just a circus! Don't take it too seriously!)

Transform? Yes.

Result: About one hour of many scenes, lastly a skeleton that wished to be evil. But it could find no acts of evil that it could commit sustainably and comfortably without it coming back and hurting itself in some way. It did many atrocious things, but whether killing off its servants (resulting in it having to do all the work now) or sneaking into homes and shooting children (resulting in increasingly stepped up security so it couldn't access them) or going to Africa and killing (resulting in having to live in the bush), none turned out to be sustainable. It gave up trying to be evil and took off a mask to reveal a person (above possibly a cathartic). Eventually it became the seal only this time, the ball stayed perfectly balanced, and in one spot, while the seal underneath moved back and forth, keeping it perfectly balanced. (1 hr +)

Note: The above took a substantial amount of time, but wasn't nearly as agonizing as the last “long” one. Possibly due to an adjusting. It would appear much like biking to Cottonwood – the very first trip is the hardest you will ever make!

Note 2: Interestingly, I no longer feel angry at a particular person (or anyone) anymore!

Q1-4: Yes. Q5: Take 100% responsibility and you'll never have any one to blame!

Feelings: I'm free! No longer bound by anger and no longer a victim of anyone! No one controls me!!